oh my gosh.

this world is so scary.

full of unloyalty and backstabbing.

just came bake from taiwan last night.

people thought that the trip was like a dream.

to me...

i don't know.

it is the sweetest dream and the worst nightmare.

i had fun and got close to people.

but

the closer ones seems to drift away and those that are already very far moves further.

i have no idea what has been said about me.

good or bad.

but i realised that some people that i trusted are not really as trustable anymore.

now that people thinks that i am fickle and changes friends easily, having no loyalty and honesty.

i feel really upset about it.

1st point.. people who knows me well knows that i am a loyal person but let goes of someone if they no longer treat me as a person who they find fun in.

2nd point.. i hardly have any people in my life which i consider is a true friend. i can't stick with someone that ain't real..

it is only when i find out and analyse things about what a so called friend did to me is when i decide whether to stick with that person or move on with my life.

and the most ridiculous thing i heard in this trip.

*it is because you are closer to the other group thats why we start disliking you*

roll eye

hey please! is this how a person should choose a friend?

a friend is someone whom you can trust. that you know will never harm you. that you know you are going to need in your life. that is true and unfake.

so what if i am closer to the other group?

but hey, i treat you as a friend. not a playmate.

people who don't know me well would think that i am a backstabber.

seriously. i never joked about friendships. it is one of the most important part of my life.

i don't know why the way they react and respond to me and my behavior reflects that i am someone who is dangerous when i treasure the friendship more than they do.

this is just like being killed by the one you loved and treasured.

why must this happen to me all the time?

like that thing that happened 2 years ago...

i thought i was really stupid not to let go of an untrue "friend"...

omg recalling it, it is so hillarious...

and that time i said something...

friends are people you find for help.
friends are people who show you the right path.
friends are someone you can tell your troubles to.
friends are not always for your happiness.
you must find happines yourself because your friend cannot change her happiness with your sadness or rage

err... getting a bit out of topic...

but i hope you know that this is how i treated people who i call my friends...

and for the fact that you thought i was siding the group that i was closer with, you are the one being bias.....

and i didn't side them at all. it was the way you and your group behaved thet made me think that way...

and finally i hope you know who you are...